Ask Her

Ask Her: Dichen Lachman


DICHEN LACHMAN Nepal-born Dichen Lachman got her start on the forever popular Aussie soap Neighbours, before being cast in Joss Whedon’s science-fiction drama Dollhouse and Netflix’s Altered Carbon. Next up, she stars in the new Ben Stiller-directed dystopian thriller series Severance—airing February 18th on Apple TV+.

Here, she answers our reader’s question about dealing with a partner with polar-opposite political views in a post-pandemic world.

My girlfriend and I are polar opposites when it comes to a lot of views. She’s what one would consider very whole, and I’m a bit more of a, um, throwback (i.e. caveman as she calls it) when it comes to my politics. This was never an issue pre-Covid, but now it’s a pretty constant argument. Now I find myself wondering if a couple can make it work long-term with such different views on the world. – Anonymous

If you can both be open-minded and compassionate, I’d love to believe you can make it work. Maybe try reframing? Or focus on the things you do agree on. The last few years have been so hard on so many people for different reasons. There will be debates for years between experts about what was right and wrong as we still struggle to understand more. Inevitably it will pass. At least I hope.

If you love each other you can get through this storm. Just make sure you’re mission-aligned for the things that really matter—your values and goals together as a team. Deep down we always know the answer. We always know what we can and can’t compromise on. Have a discussion with an open mind and be kind to each other. Worst case, your paths lead to different journeys. Maybe it’s time to really assess what you both want. Whatever is best for you both will happen, and it will be ok.