Ask Her

Ask Her: AnnaSophia Robb

HER

ANNASOPHIA ROBB The actress starred in the classic remakes of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Race to Witch Mountain, the film version of the beloved children’s book Bridge to Terabithia, then later in the critical darling The Way Way Back with Sam Rockwell. Recently, Robb starred in two of Hulu’s most critically acclaimed series: 2019’s The Act and 2020’s Emmy-nominated Little Fires Everywhere. She also led the cast of horror series The Expecting and can currently be seen in both the crime-drama biopic Lansky, alongside Harvey Keitel and Sam Worthington, and the Peacock limited-series Dr. Death, alongside Joshua Jackson, Alec Baldwin, and Christian Slater.

Q:
Do you think the natural but inevitable evolution of a long term relationship is that it changes into a more partner/best friends zone eventually?
A:

I do think in healthy long term relationships that frenetic and obsessive buzz eventually turns into something that’s more under-the-surface. I guess I’d describe it as a subdued bliss, or a groundedness and steady that comes because you trust that the other person loves you as much as you love them. Partner, yes. Best friend zone? No. It should go beyond a zone. If there’s a wall there, then I think that’s an issue.

The ideal long term relationship, in my mind, would be that we do feel like partners, building each other up and having each other’s backs through all seasons of life. If my partner (who I’ve been with for over five years) still felt like a new boyfriend, I think I’d feel like we hadn’t matured or really understood the deeper parts of one another.

I find it beautiful when couples are best friends, but of course you gotta keep up the spice! And that’s surely possible. It might just take more work than at first, but isn’t that a fun adventure? Working and building something together that is uniquely your own?

My grandparents were together for 64 years, 11 months, and 8 days (my grandpa kept track). They had the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had the privilege of witnessing. By the end, they DEFINITELY acted as partners, but I watched them continue to flirt, in cute little ways, even into their 80s.

For me, I want my partner to be my best friend—especially this past year when we were together 24/7, but also have… physical benefits (lol) that a regular best friend doesn’t. I mean, you’re sharing a life and bed together!

Also, I don’t think it’s fair to expect one person to be all things. Would you want your partner to put all that pressure on you? Sometimes you need other best friends, or friends who are interested in the same hobbies as you, or other friends to make you appreciate why your partner is your partner.


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