Halloween is a week away and some of you geeks have had your costumes ready since last Halloween. For the rest of us, it may be an eleventh hour Hail Mary sort of situation. If you’re not looking to throw a sheet with some eye holes over your head, we’ve got you covered with our updated, annual list of some pretty rad costumes you should be able to pull together with a mixture of items already hanging in your closet, fished out of the dollar bin at your local thrift store, borrowed from a friend, or overnighted on Amazon. That and a little bit of ingenuity should get you there.
KEN AND BARBIE
Grab all the neon you can get your hands on and go to town. Works on its own or as the ultimate couples costume.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Colorful Shirt
- Colorful Shorts
- Visor
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Rollerblades
- Fanny Pack
- Knee Pads
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Get a spray tan.
COBRA KAI
You get to walk around barking phrases like, “The Best Defense is More Offense” and randomly high-kicking the air (or your drunk friends).
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Gi
FINISHING TOUCHES
If you want to truly nerd out, and you’re on the side of Miyagi-Do, get a Den-den Daiko drum. Want to be Johnny Lawrence? Grab a Coors Banquet to carry around. Otherwise, stick to:
- Tie Headband
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Can’t get your hands on a Gi? A black tee, black wide-leg pant, and black ribbon tied around your forehead should do the trick.
CARMY FROM THE BEAR
Steal all the hearts and make every guy jealous as their girlfriends stare at you by being this year’s hottest messed up chef.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- White T-Shirt
- Apron
FINISHING TOUCHES
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Draw some tattoos on your arms, fry lots of onions and garlic so your clothes stink like a sweaty kitchen, and don’t shower for three days.
GORDON GEKKO
You get to play the rich asshole for a night.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Pleated Trousers
- Bold Tie
- Suspenders
- Fake Gold Watch
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Strong Hair Gel
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Throw on a jacket, the gel, and voila—you are now Patrick Bateman from American Psycho. Or any Wall Street asshole.
BEVERLY HILLS COP
Even if you’re not as funny as Eddie Murphy in his most iconic role, Axel Foley, this is your chance to break out those comedy skills.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black Zip-Up Hoodie
- Gray Sweatshirt
- Fake Toy Gun
- Jeans
- White Adidas Sneakers
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Black Wrist Watch
- Badge
- Black Aviator Glasses
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
A varsity jacket will also do the trick. Or just throw on a hoodie and keep yelling at your crotch to “look alive!”
CLARENCE FROM TRUE ROMANCE
Ole faithful, yes, but always so cool, so cool, so cool. No brainer if you’re needing to do a couples costume.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- White Crewneck Tee
- Light Blue Jeans
- Hawaiian Shirt
- Elvis Glasses
FINISHING TOUCHES
Slick back that hair. Get your gal pal to play Alabama Worley.
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Can’t get your hands on a Hawaiian shirt and Elvis shades? Just throw on a black bomber jacket, red hoodie, and blue jeans.
GEORGIE FROM IT
If this doesn’t work for you, it’s a great costume for your kid… cause balloon.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Yellow Raincoat
- Black Pants
- Red Balloon
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Paper Boat
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Red balloon?
KEVIN FROM HOME ALONE
Get used to hearing, “Ya filthy animal” all night long.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Red Sweater
- Army Green Pants
- Hairdryer
- Toy Gun (with strap)
FINISHING TOUCHES
Get two buddies (or your kids) to play the thieves. Or, add these to the outfit:
- Beanie
- Scarf
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Reverse that. You play the thief and get your kid to play Kevin.
EDGAR ALLEN POE
Kids these days will have no idea who you are. But if you happen to be a brunette and you own a black suit, the bird sells the rest.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black Three-Piece Suit
- White Shirt
- Ascot / Short Neck Scarf
- Fake Crow
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Mustache
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
You can always just tell them you’re Sweeney Todd. Or any Tim Burton character for that matter.
THE ADDAMS FAMILY
If you need a costume for the whole family… it doesn’t get better than this.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Lots of Black or Victorian Looking Clothes
- A Large Family
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Face Paint
- Hand Prop
- Mustache
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Pick one. Any one of them, and go it alone.
MARRIED WITH CHILDREN
Another great family costume. No one born after 1985 will know who you are, but it’ll be a big hit with Gen Xers.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Anything Made Before the 80s
- Friends or Family (to fill out the rest of the gang)
FINISHING TOUCHES
Those hairdos though…
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
You can go as any quintessentially 80s family. Or the Full House segment of WandaVision.
LLOYD DOBLER
Short of wearing a white sheet over your head with some eye holes in it, this is as easy and lazy (but, yes, awesome) as it gets, and it even comes with your personal soundtrack.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Trench Coat
- Joggers
- Vintage Band T-Shirt (ideally The Clash)
- Boombox
FINISHING TOUCHES
- 80s Dunks
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Any oversized coat, pants, and tee combo should work as long as you have that boombox. Now, if you don’t have a boombox (does anyone these days?), make one out of cardboard.
THE DUDE
For one, you know you’ll be comfortable. Secondly, people will be so excited to see you. Who doesn’t love The Dude?
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- White T-Shirt
- Shorts
- Robe
- Sunglasses
- Sandals
FINISHING TOUCHES
The beard / wig combo will go over big. Order lots of White Russians. Get a friend to play Walter.
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Wear your coziest sweater or robe and don’t brush your hair for a week.
PULP FICTION
If you own a black suit and black tie (or know someone who does) it doesn’t get much easier or cooler than this.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black Suit
- White Shirt
- Black Tie
- Black Shoes
- Fake Toy Gun
FINISHING TOUCHES
The hair is the part of this costume that sells this. Nail that, and you’ve got a hit on your hands. Get your lady friend to play the Uma role and tell some tomato jokes.
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Get yourself a Kangol hat and just be Samuel L. Jackson. Doesn’t get much cooler than that.
DANNY ZUKO
If you have REALLY waited until the last minute, this is the costume for you.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black Jeans
- Black Tee (roll those sleeves)
- White Socks
- Hair Grease
- Black Shoes
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Comb (behind the ear)
- Pack of Cigarettes (rolled up in your sleeve)
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
If you can’t manage to make this work, Halloween is just not your holiday.
FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS
Ok so this is not exactly lazy… but there are variations of this you can make work.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Printed Collar Shirt
- Blue Shorts
- Bucket Hat
- Sunglasses
- Briefcase
- Cigarette Holder
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Fly Swatter
- Get a Friend to Play Gonzo
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
If you can just get a hold of the hat and glasses, just throw on your zaniest outfit combo. If they still don’t get it, you can always tell them you’re Gilligan.
CLINT EASTWOOD
Got a poncho?
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Jeans
- Poncho
- Hat
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Cowboy Boots
- Some Facial Scruff
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Make a makeshift poncho out of a Mexican style blanket.
INDIANA JONES
Bonus One: You get to be Indiana Jones for one night. Bonus 2: You get to be Indiana Jones for one night.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Cargos
- Safari or Khaki Shirt (rip off that sleeve)
- Brown Fedora
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Shoulder bag
- Toy Machete
- Sweat
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Anything khaki in your closet will do. Just don’t forget to tear off that sleeve.
THE GODFATHER
Got a tux burning a hole in your closet? Now is its time to shine.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black Tux
- White Shirt
- Red Rose
FINISHING TOUCHES
Some potatoes in the mouth perhaps? Slick back that do and add some silver hairspray.
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Just wear any black suit and do a lot of squinting, mumbling, wiping of the face, and repeat “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse.”
UFC CHAMP
If you’ve put in a lot of time at the gym, this is your chance to let those abs shine. Hope you didn’t forget Leg Day.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- UFC Shorts
- UFC Belt
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Flag of Choice
- Fingerless Gloves
- Makeshift Cauliflower Ears (out of your kid’s Play Doh)
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Throw on the shortest shorts in your closet (or some bike shorts) and strut your stuff.
THE TERMINATOR
We know that you know SOMEONE who has a black leather jacket to loan you.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Black T-shirt
- Black Jeans
- Black Leather Jacket
- Fake Toy Gun
- Black Wrap-Around Sunglasses
FINISHING TOUCHES
Spike up that hair.
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Throw on a whole lot of black and rehearse a couple Terminator catchphrases like: “Hasta la vista, baby” and “I’ll be back.”
ELLIOT FROM E.T.
Otherwise known as, the world’s laziest costume. A crowd pleaser none the less.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Blue Jeans
- Red Hoodie
- E.T. Doll
FINISHING TOUCHES
Get your lady friend to play Gertie. Leave a trail of Reese’s Pieces everywhere you go (who doesn’t love candy on Halloween?)
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Wrap your baby up in a blanket and have him play E.T.
RUN-DMC
If you have two buddies, or even two children, this is as comfy of a costume as they come.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Tracksuits
- Black Fedoras or Kangol Hats
- Glasses
- Gold Chains
- White Adidas
FINISHING TOUCHES
- Boombox
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Wear any and all Adidas swag you, or a friend, own and travel in a trio all night long.
FREE GUY
Don’t have a good day, have a great day.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- Blue Button-down (short sleeve)
- Khakis
- Stripe Tie (ideally yellow)
FINISHING TOUCHES
- ‘Guy’ Name Tag
- Wrap Around Sunglasses
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
You can just say you’re a J.Crew catalog model.
THREE MEN AND A BABY
If you have two buddies at just as much of a loss for a costume as you are, this could be it. Bonus if one of you has a real baby to drag along.
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
- White Shirt
- Open Tie
- Suspenders
- Fake Baby (or real)
FINISHING TOUCHES
- 80s Gold Watch
- Caterpillar Mustache
IF ALL ELSE FAILS
Any oversized shirts out of your closet will do. Just make sure you have, well, three men and a baby.
